For about a month, I have been trying online dating at a friend’s suggestion. This made sense to me since I have little time to go out to meet guys. So I filled out the profile honestly and to the point, topping it off with a picture of myself at the beach. The first day, I got a message from a LARPer. For those of you who don’t know, Live Action Role Players are worse than the stereo typical D&D role-player on the dork line (I know, I table top role-play). LARPers dress in costume and fight with foam swords. This particular guy was about 100 pounds overweight and in his 40’s. I really should have known right there what I was getting into.
Over the past month, I have talked to many people that were interested in me, but I either didn’t have anything in common with them, they creeped me out, or they were way too pushy. So today I went to check my messages on OkCupid and found three waiting for me. One was from an attractive guy in his late 20’s…asking me if I would like to date his girlfriend. He was very polite about it and very well spoken; however, he thought that his girlfriend would be interested in me and thought I may want to meet her.
Message number two simply asked if I would like to fuck. Which brings me to message number three; this was from a guy who I have been sending messages back and forth with about books for a while. He explained that he couldn’t wait to read a fantasy novel I recommended to him…then proceeded to ask me if I had ever read the Bible, commenting that he noticed I wasn’t listed as a Christian. The rest of the message was him telling me about the glory of God.
So my OkCupid lessons about myself for the day are: 1) Attractive, well spoken guys are not interested, but their girlfriends may be. 2) Strangers want to fuck me. 3) I should be saved.